God Has Surprised Me

Imagine you are in a narrow and long road. You may stop for a while and realize that you don’t know why you are there. Then things like these come to your brain:

“Why am I here?”
“Why should I take this path?”
“What is the last junction before I took this path?”
“If I take another path, what will I find there?”

Now I am on such road. Why should I be here in Bangkok? Why should I take this money ‘robbing’ student exchange program to Thailand? Two or three times, I heard some discouraging words from people which were ignorant. Yet, I felt weaken and drowned in a situation; asking “Why am I here?”.

Then God surprised me.
I had a new family and new friends. A new understanding of who God really is.
I met Tim Eady, Natalie, Naveed, Pray, Christian, Yoshihiro and Sam. I met kak Reksi, kak Solya and kak Christian. They are all good christians which made me feel that my decision to go to Bangkok is the very right thing I could ever choose.

I love them, escpecially Tim Eady. He is an associate pastor of Christ Church Bangkok (he is like my father, but older; 60 maybe, english man). In the first day when I went to the small group meeting after Sunday service of youth there, I met Tim and others. Tim talked a little bit about the parable of talent and our needs to become the faithful and fruitful servants of Jesus. 

After that, we held a discussion about ‘confirming’ which is a public declaration of faith right before Bishops. It’s like confirming to everybody that you are really comitting yourself to follow Jesus. After the small group meeting, I talked with Tim privately and pulled out my confusion of infant baptism which is for some people, are not really a baptism. And I asked him that I want to declare my faith once more since that decision was purely mine, not of my parents. I also asked him to pray for my family. Then Tim asked me to join him in prayer. Tim asked God to come upon us and help me, and cast away my problems. Then in the lines of his prayer sentences, here came the words from my lovely Lord via Tim:

Do not fear. You are mine. You belong to me. I still have work for you to do.
You will have peace passes human understanding.

I was so happy and overwhelmed into the point where I broke into tears. It was so beautiful, my friend. To be declared by the Holy God as His possesion; It’s more beautiful than being declared as a powerful King or Queen. I’m not exaggerating. This question has troubled me for a long time; "how do I make sure that I have my part in His kingdom?" (I knew the answer was by believing, but what kind of "believing"? "Am I on my right path?", that kind of question). Then it was answered on that day. I am His possesion and I will not be taken away from His hands anymore.

I fell in love with Jesus once more.
His love had captured me again. I kept repeating those sentences in my head days after and my tears silently just poured out whenever I remembered it. I was so happy and believe it or not; I couldn’t keep my hands to let my bible idle on the table anymore (sometimes I skipped my lunch, searching for a hiding place like a quiet zone in the library to pray and read His words). Reading His words brings peace to me. I feel like there is a real change which is going on in me. I love Him more. I just really in love with Jesus. Why is He so beautiful and lovable? I can’t get over Him.

These things which God had already prepared for me long before I went to Bangkok are really surprising to me. Kak Reksi, another Indonesian from Kalimantan which I’m really sure that I wouldn't have any chance to meet her unless I enroll to the student exchange program; she is the leader of our small group of bible study; I got fellowship in her and she was a really good sister in God. She taught me and others a lot about bounding a good relationship with God. Not to mention other member, kak Solya and kak Christian, they are v-nice friends.

Naveed also, a very calm and gifted friend. He has in him a handful of knowledge which He believes come from the grace of God. He told me many stories, serious and really serious matters (one of the stories was a vision about That One bad guy from hell, and I just stopped him before he started telling the whole story because the street was so dark and I had to go alone a few yards before I reached home at that nigt :p ).

See? There are a lot good and unexpected things which God had have provided for me. I am happy that I always be in my trust of Him. I’m happy that out of so many people, He already chosen me as His belonging.  And I am ready to work for Him.

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